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Friday, October 22, 2010

Was That It? Really? (More on Heron Haus)

The "breakfast" in Bed and Breakfast would imply that it's role in your experience should be memorable. If not memorable, at least adequate. We were told that the gourmet breakfasts were exceptional. If by gourmet you mean small portions on big plates than yes, it was right on the mark. We were first served a handful of mixed berries with a dollop of plain yogurt. There was coffee, juice and a large assortment of teas. Our next course was a skinny wedge of quiche garnished with three bites of a beet and two tiny triangles of toast. We were always graciously told where the ingredients were from. After waiting for 15 minutes, thinking that these were tasty appetizers we realized that this was indeed the end.

The next day we were met with the same small bowl of berries and plain yogurt. This time we were prepared for the lack of substance and had grabbed a few cookies from the night before to eat in the morning. (These are oatmeal raisin, chocolate chip cookies the size of a half dollar. Same cookies, each evening, left on an uncovered plate.)  A two or three bite muffin with jam accompanied an elegant southwestern fritatta served in individual 3x5 shallow dishes, not quite an inch deep. On the side were three bite sized pieces of breakfast squash, garnished with a mint leaf. Again, juice, coffee and tea were available.

So the last morning we hardly saw the point of rising early when we knew we would be in search of a more substantial breakfast elsewhere. When my husband did venture downstairs an hour later, our hostess said, "Oh there you are, you missed breakfast." He told her we were both very tired and needed to sleep in a bit. There was still several travelers finishing up their breakfasts, the kitchen was still open. She made no offer of breakfast to us. After we were packed and ready to check out, maybe 20 minutes later, I knocked on the half open door of the kitchen.  Two lonely fruit and yogurt bowls sat on the counter. When I handed her the keys she again made no offer to give us our (paid for) breakfast. There is a difference between a light breakfast and a skimpy one. I should know, I learned how to make a slice of bread feed 6 children.

Note to Self:
1. Gourmet actually means meagerly servings of mildly tasty creations on large plates.
2.You are only served when you are seated at the place setting, no wandering.  (I witnessed a poor elderly women be told that she wouldn't be served until she sat down at the place setting where she took her coffee mug from.)
3. If you snooze, you lose, literally. Breakfast doesn't start at 8:30am it IS at 8:30, no exceptions.
4. This bed and breakfast would be more aptly named, bed and snack.

Next:  The Room

3 comments:

  1. Love the blogs on your experiences and the tongue in cheek humor; sort of like lashing your host with a wet noodle. Definitely a place to stay away from!

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  2. Holy what? I know my view's a little skewed, because I'm currently holidaying in Vietnam, land of 'can I bring you another huge plate of food? How about more tea? Coffee? Juice? No? Then you have to have more toast', but even so! Cheeky!

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  3. I hope the bed was better than the breakfast

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